Black done better

I heard this song by pearl jam for the first time during my India trip. Needless to say, I thought it was beautiful and amazing, as most people do. So I think it's only fitting that my first video post be a good version of the same. Here's staind singing black. The guy can really sing. Check out "it's been awhile" by him. Another favorite for me.

Terry Pratchett rules!

Check this line out. I just stumbled on it yesterday…

Wickedness is a myth invented by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others

Hehe.. isn’t that just brilliant. I don’t have much to say at this point. Kind of strung for time. But have decided that most headings from now on are going to be Pratchett lines. The guy’s a genius.

Spit or swallow, he thought, the eternal conundrum

Am I more than you bargained for yet
I've been dying to tell you anything you want to hear
Cause that's just who I am this week

I can be as painfully blunt as I can be a subtle never-really-get-to-the-point-EVER kind of person. I am mostly straightforward with regards to myself and all roundabouty with others. I guess I am cautious. Or is it careful? I never thought I was being dishonest ‘cos I didn’t tell someone that their new hairstyle actually looks like a bouffant and they should seriously consider a new hairstylist. I just thought I was being nice. Don’t we all do it? Remember that line you said to your friend – it’ll all be alright soon. :-) No it won’t. But we say it ‘cos it’s what needs to be said.

That’s the point. We say what needs to be said. Not everyone can open up to everyone else. It’s not just hard, but might be considered rude. Everyone has their set of pals who they are comfortable with; and with whom anything from daily crap-fest to a myriad mind plan can be shared with. I have few of such pals.

So why is it few instead of "a" few pals??? I talk incessantly, most speech though sorely lacking in content, with pretty much anyone who seems to be listening. But I have major hard time actually opening up to people. So the few are few ‘cos I am comfortable with them and don’t see a need to portray a charade. Hmm.. wait I do that with them too, but I more likely to tell them the time of the day.

So how does one end up making this choice; even if it’s sub conscious? I am horribly candid with a pal, to the point where I never distorted anything and presented my head for what it was. The fact that it was received without hysteria was what probably made me feel nice and I am yet to ever talk much crap to him. Some amount of crap trickles down ‘cos I am incapable of being entirely honest. Not in the sense of lying as much as, showing. The transparency that some things I say can show are scary, even to me and I am afraid of being misjudged or scared of loosing something beautiful that, well, I distort or fuzzyfy the presentation from time to time.

And there are people to whom all the facets aren’t always presented to. Not ‘cos they don’t need to know; but more ‘cos it’s better off without them knowing. Better off for me in any case. On turning 18, I went to a bar and drank all the different kind of drinks they had one after the other in under half an hour before trudging out. I didn’t particularly have any goal then. I just thought it’s what grownups do and I wanted to explore my new found freedom. :-) there is no way I am repeating that stunt by drinking gin or brandy straight. I now have a hard time drinking anything that isn’t watered down like those $2 happy hour drinks. My dad gathered I drank stuff at 24 and imposed what he called a prohibition when I was home. He means well, of course. But I know he’d have broken my bones if he’d have found out anything sooner. Am I sure he’d have gotten mad? No. I’d made a choice there based on all the facts I had. Remembering everything that made him mad (with me that was a long list) and seeing if drinking alcohol would be considered a-ok or not. I figured not and never told him. Do I feel like I did the right thing by not telling him? Actually I don’t think about it much.

When you do tell, some folk fly off the handle. Now my ol roomie thinks I'm an alcoholic in sore need for help and has been hinting at AA meetings. How can one tell teetollers that a drink from time to time isn't the end of the world? Bless her heart for trying. She had to listen to me defend my right to a drink ‘cos I care as much for her opinion as any other. It's not so much that the other person has to bleed like you to see you are in pain; but that would put stuff in perspective for them right? I know as many prudes as I don't and one can't ever tell till it's too late.

I think if people stopped over reacting to trifle issues, everyone would be more open. But it’s not just about discussing taboo issues. If people seemed to care and actually wanted to talk, you’d be more than happy to talk I guess. But one can’t force an intimate session. It’s either gonna happen or not. If I dodge a question you put me; there could be a few reasons why. It could be ‘cos I don’t feel like spilling my guts right then; to you; or I’d rather not talk about some things. Period. So don’t come around and tell me I need to get it out of my system. If I feel like clutching onto something.. no amount of recounting is going to purge it out. I’ll do it when, if ever, I am ready. Thank you very much.

Is it that hard to be happy?

Alice came to the fork in the road.
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."

I keep telling folks that are close to me that I like to be happy. People usually see this perpetual smile plastered on my face. Some, unfortunately, manage to perceive me as the broody kinds; even if it’s merely for a little while.

I do want to be happy and don’t see many things coming my way to stop it. Yet, I manage to find things to bug me and pull me down day in and day out. If it’s not something about me, then it’s an issue that’s ailing a friend or a relative. I’ve realized that I spend more time working out on someone else’s issue than my own. And the absurdity of it all is that I can see solutions for them, but can’t for my own.

There are times when you don’t want a solution of a problem. Well that’s a weird line. It’s not so much that you don’t want it as there isn’t one. In such cases you probably just want someone to be around you and give you support while you sort out the mess. I have luckily been blessed with wonderful people who care. But, sometimes that alone can’t turn the grey skies into blue.

I am practical in my view of life in an unpractical way. How can I know what needs to be fixed and yet I avoid it? I keep playing the “what if” game. The thought of, maybe I’m just happy with being sad crosses my mind. It’s a silly thing to say. Don’t I know it? Nevertheless, it appears to be true sometimes… how I am incapable of shaking the blues away…coming down to the point where I sometimes welcome the feeling ‘cos it’s become a part of my routine now. I’ll prolly miss the feeling if I was indeed happy all the time. Or would I?

Hehe. If I had a nickel for every time I raised a q that was just downright lame, I’d be richer for sure. I try to seek comfort by blaming my problems on money or rather the lack of it. But sometimes, the sinking feeling kicks in that I’m just trying to make myself feel better by finding lame things to blame stuff on. In the end, it’s not so much whom you can blame things on, as how you end up emerging from them. For that matter I rarely go far with - pass the blaming torch - game. I don’t know whether it had something to do with the social makeup of being an Indian that a healthy dose of self deprecation just seems like a normal thing; or I’m just wired differently. I blame myself for pretty much everything. And I should too. After all, choices you make, no matter in what circumstances you do, are still your choices. You can’t really take em back. You can view them from a different perspective later on, which will bring the much needed solace. Trust me on that one.

I think re-thinking one’s step is a good move. But you can also get stuck at a turn like me. I keep thinking so much, that I never move… much akin to the agnostic who is choosing immobility as a means of transportation (boy do I love that line!). The agnostic might have a complex reasoning structure for his/ her stance; but that’s something no one else can see.

I have repeatedly been told something very much on the lines that where you end up isn't the most important thing. It's the road you take to get there, which you’ll look back on and call your life. And that the road to success is lined with many tempting parking spaces. So I figured I am one who is perpetually parked, lest she loose her spot or something.

I don’t know what it is I am honestly afraid of. But it scares the shit out of me. I could use a hug right about now. Maan. Those were simpler times when I could just demand them. Now weirdly, I don’t even know how to earn em.

I feel niceeeee

I ain't happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine, in a bag
I'm useless,but not for long
The future is coming on

I read something really nice today. I got a testimonial writ by a dear friend which just made me feel awfully special. Here I was thinking I’d come by and rant on about some weird misgiving that I’m going through; but it’s all gone now. I know the effect is temporary and whatever was brewing in mah head will come back tomorrow or a lil later. But that’s for another day, another time. I will bask in this feel good feeling for now.

Come to think of it, we should all keep some things, mementos, the trinkets that create a smile. I ran across a bunch of old mails from mom, dad and friends when I was at home two months ago. I was happy, nostalgic and sobbing away to glory. You know the kind… hindi philm mafiq- kushi ke asoon. I think I’ve chucked a few of them along the way which I should have clung on to. Memory with regards to finer detail doesn’t work the same after awhile. Beautiful lines and first touches will be forgotten. It’s good to have things that’ll help u remember and are sure to brighten up a cloudy day.

Thanks my darling, for making my day!

Even when I have more important things to do..

..I can't steer away from inane crap that floods the net. Do read this article that was originally posted in the Hindustan Times, but has been saved for our viewing pleasure.

Why being drunk is better

The wise have spoken about the joys of drinking. There are enough quotes about the ecstasy one gets from drinkin like …

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading - Henny Youngman.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy - Benjamin Franklin.

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer - Clement Freud.

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind - Humphrey Bogart.

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I had lost exactly two weeks - Joe E. Lewis.

Jeez. There are too many and I don’t want to go crazy pasting here. Think about it though. All arguments take place when you are sober, not drunk. You are always having a ball and people are friends when everyone is drunk. You don’t remember all the weird things you did or said when you are drunk. Hangovers only come about when u get sober.

The trick is to find your personal threshold and then drink a lil more than that.

Cheerz ;-)

Damned if you do and damned if you don’t!

What is it about sex that has most people so worked up? I always thought it was the most overrated topic there was. People make too much of it, giving it importance it doesn’t really deserve. Sure, I might have wanted it at different points of time. I am not talking about a person’s need for it. That’s totally different from a person’s weird standpoint on it.

Somehow this one thing can imbibe everything from your integrity to your depravity. It’s so stupid and yet here I am stuck in it. Hmm. Maybe you are only stuck if you let yourself be thrown/ drawn into the mire. I unfortunately can be tugged into most shit rather easily.

I refuse to acknowledge. Crap. Me saying I refuse to acknowledge anything at this point is an oxymoron. Hehe. I am a moron as much as the person next to me. But, I would like to believe that I see some things differently. More sensibly, if you will. And I hate the fact that I have to muse about stuff that holds no relevance whatsoever to me. It’s good to get worked up about something from time to time, but I’d like to do such an exercise over something that I care about. My kids for example. But sex? Pbbbbft.

I guess we all want/ need it at some point of time or the other and we mistake this for more than what it is. Sex doesn’t rule my life anymore than the planets dictate your fate. But one can still get all tangled up in it. I hate that. I don’t wanna get worked up about trivia. Lol. Maybe I could even say that I don’t wanna work.

So much to figure out and it’s always like I do them against a time line. Maybe deadlines for me are better ‘cos I procrastinate like crazy otherwise; thinking about inconsequential matters that just fringe the decision I am going to make.

I doubt there is a set standard of how much sex is too much. I could be more sexually driven than some people and vice versa. Hmm. Why are we still talking about this?

One can’t write when one doesn’t know what bugs them. Same with discussions and arguments. What a wasteful use of space.

If music be the food of love... play on!

Wow oh wow. I had been dying to see Joe Satriani live, but little did I think that it would be as good as the concert turned out to be. There were so many things that went oh so well.

If the real estate mantra, location location location, is something to go by; then Warfield and Fillmore are the best places in the bay area to catch a concert. Period. I usually stand in line for a bit to ensure that I am up against the stage n all, but we ended up coming late today. Our locations were still rather good. In front of the lead, about 5 feet away. Couldn’t have asked for better places.

Eric Johnson started the show. A cropped hairstyle and killer jeans on, guy looked like a younger chap with an old man’s face. I couldn’t believe my eyes. The guy’s aged a lot. He belted out a bunch of songs. I had a hard time averting my eyes from him. I hardly noticed the drummer or the bassist. The bass was a little too turned up and was thinking the whole show was going to be doomed, but things picked up.

When Eric was done and Satriani came on, people obviously went crazy. Instead of starting off with some random new song, Sat did a few hits from his old albums. By now I was thumping the rhythm so much with my foot that I knew my right foot was gonna drop off at some point. I need to change the way I stand in concerts. My right foot invariably starts hurting, but it’s sooner sometimes depending on how much I am enjoying the music.

Now Satriani’s drummer, Jeff I think, was bloody cool. The chappie was playing to his own dhun and it was so enthralling to see him. Till now in the concert, I was like... I need to pick that ‘ol guitar up and start practicing. I was already trying to pick up a few chords while Sat and Eric were playing, but after watching the drummer, I started getting those old feelings of learning the drums as well. I guess one thing at a time. I still can’t strum for shit, so drums ki baat door hai.

One thing is for sure. Music turns me on. If Jethro Tull’s concert was such that I would make out; I would have f***ed for sure in this one. I mean, the music just took control. My head was bobbing, my feet n fingers were tapping and my arms would shoot out from time to time. I was having a ball of a time.

I have a problem. I can’t find the bass. I’ve mentioned this to a bunch of people and everyone tries to help me “pick” the bass out. I can only tell when I see musicians play live, where n when the bass is filling in. So, in the Satriani’s part of the concert, the bassist was kickin ass (with rather perfectly curled hair, might I add). The position that was odd was of the rhythm guitarists. I mean, I could hardly hear the chap and it seemed that he was there for no reason whatsoever.

The coolest part of the concert was when Sat came back on to do the encore and called Eric and some other chappie and did a couple of G3 numbers. Going down and Hendrix… That was the amazing part.. getting to see a part G3 concert by paying a fraction of the cost.

It’s late. I have been standing for more than 6 hours. I drove a lot. I’m hyper and tired at the same time. I wanted to type whatever ‘cos if I don’t do this one now, it’ll probably come up after a few years instead.

An apt song for the moment

This one called Breathe by Anna Nalick is good. I couldn't have said it better myself (yeah right!)

2 AM and she calls me ’cause I’m still awake,
Can you help me unravel my latest mistake,
I don’t love him, winter just wasn’t my season
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites, you’re all here for the very same reason

‘Cause you can’t jump the track,we’re like cars on a cable
And life’s like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl,
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe, just breathe,
Woah breathe, just breathe

May he turn 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
Just a day, he sat down to the flask in his fist,
Ain’t been sober, since maybe October of last year.
Here in town you can tell he’s been down for a while,
But my God it’s so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him, maybe I’ll just sing about it.

Cause you can’t jump the track, we’re like cars on a cable,
And life’s like an hourglass, glued to the table.
No one can find the rewind button boys,
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe, just breathe,
Woah breathe, just breathe

There’s a light at each end of this tunnel, you shout
‘Cause you’re just as far in as you’ll ever be out
These mistakes you’ve made, you’ll just make them again
If you only try turning around.

2 AM and I’m still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, its no longer
Inside of me, threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I’m naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you’ll use them, however you want to

Cause you can’t jump the track, we’re like cars on a cable,
And life’s like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
And breathe, just breathe

Why I can’t trust people

I have a basic problem when it comes to accepting love and affection from others. My own, I give away easily. But, when someone reciprocates, I’m stumped. I don’t know why, but everything needs to be justified and my actions (at least the immediate ones) are checked to make sure I did do something to deserve it. I don’t let people like me the way I like them.

I was actually flipping through some psychology book yesterday and came across a part where the author was describing me. He said I would have a tendency to be more vulnerable, and in his opinion an incorrect view, to the idea that I don’t deserve to be loved. I feel unworthy of love and it’s hard for me to establish my worth. And this hidden, almost subconscious, feeling of unworthiness generates the fear of needing others. I think I won’t be supported. So, being afraid that I won’t be supported, I end up pushing away the support that I do need. So people around me who receive this message that I don’t trust them to fulfill my needs feel rejected. At this point, my hopelessness, coupled with the fact that I have pushed away any iota of support I was getting, will start to morph me into a needy person. The other person is already turned off at this point ‘cos it appears that their best is not good enough. Curiously, men are turned on when they feel needed but are averted to neediness. I can understand where that feeling stems up from. Anyways, going along… it’s bad enough that needing others is confusing as it is. Being disappointed or abandoned, even in the smallest ways, tends to be especially painful then. It’s not easy for me to depend on others and then be ignored or rejected. This whole “needing others” puts me in a vulnerable spot. So, being ignored or disappointed ends up hurting more ‘cos it affirms my belief of unworthiness.

For someone who is so responsive and accommodating to other people’s needs, I suck being at the receiving end. He says that deep inside I don’t feel worthy of receiving, so I end up giving more thinking that would make me more deserving.

The weird thing is that everyone I know is so special and amazing and I would never think twice about what I do for them, or think if they deserve it or not. But, when the bottle turns to me, this doubt never ends. I don’t know if it has stemmed from my past or my mental makeup is a little screwed up. I know of some folk, weirdly all women, who sometimes confess to this feeling and though I know my consoling them or telling them everyone feels the same (that’s not true…but you say it in the moment) doesn’t really help. The fact that someone is there to listen to them, who comprehends their feelings might just help tip over the depression bout they were having. These things sometimes take time; sometimes you never really get over them. Each episode of such n such takes you right back to the gallows.

What bugs me is that I’m sorely aware of this. Reading this book just put the idea into words. I didn’t know why I felt the way I did and I would constantly try to battle it out. When there were moments and times where I felt amazing when I just let go; I’d invariably analyze it and curb any outward feelings of indigence that I might be putting out there. It’s not that I want to come across as “cool”, but I feel too naked putting the whole of me on display. When people do try, my reticent stance invariably pushes them off. I have a hard time sharing and an even harder time being honest about myself. The blow that someone might actually turn away after I’ve bared my core is just hard to take I guess. Weirdly, it feels amazing to be candid and to be received that way. Yet, time and again, I fall back to my evil ways. I guess they’re not evil as such. Just a little lopsided in that, that’s a new turf for me and will take a little getting used to.

I know that it’s not the people that lack “trustiness”. I just need to gather enough pluck. Perhaps embark on a road where my feelings aren’t exactly guarded in a maximum security vault. Perhaps even show temerity with regards to these things. How will I learn unless I learn to let go eh?

Which classic movie are you? Whatever that means :-/

The whole trip I am on where I go on and on about stuff that just sounds deep is usually fine. But its probably better for me to move away from such things from time to time. Which is when I've decided I will post a random music post or something similarily arbit that is badly writ. So in that spirit, here's more weird info to while your time with.

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Who would have thunk it that an Indiana Jones fan would also mirror the movie in her personality. I AM a thrill seeker, but I seriously doubt my entire existence is based on adventure. Hmm.

The most hilarious dinner speech ever made!

I am a huge fan of the Daily show by Jon Stewart. One of the anchors from the show, Steven Colbert, branched out to do a show that airs right after the daily show and looks a lot like it too. But I was wrong about that. It didn’t take more than 2 episodes to realize the satire interwoven into Steven’s Colbert report. I like it just as much and these two shows have become part of my staple TV diet. Hmm.. more like they are my diet.

Now Stephen got to talk in the White house correspondence dinner and it was hilarious. The man has major balls to go and say the things he did, right in front of the president and all those people. I doubt the president even understood where he was coming from. Khair. Here’s a link that has a summary and links to watch the show. If that links doesn’t work, here’s the video in 3 parts : part 1 , part 2 and part 3.

Bon appetite.

Iron maiden rocks eh?

OK. Obviously heavy rock or metal isn’t my forte, but this post has been awhile coming.

People get into bands for different reasons. You look some bands up ‘cos of the song that the radio won’t stop playing or some album a friend handed you or even because you ended up reading the lyrics and just had to get your hands on that band’s music (my induction into Floyd happened ‘cos I read the Time lyrics and just couldn’t help falling in love with them. The band took some getting used to, but boy was it worth it).

Now maiden is different for me in that, I saw them live before particularly caring for them. The raw energy the band sends out (what are they in their late 50’s now???) was just contagious. By the time maiden had got onto the stage, I had been running around the whole day, soaking up way too much sun and music and was tired to the bone. So I had decided I’d just lie down and wait for them to get done. The crowd went crazy when they got on and my interest perked up and I was on my feet as well.

Now at this point, it’s important to note that my maiden knowledge is close to nil. I had heard trooper a bunch of times (‘cos Dili said he used to play it lot as a kid and I added that song to my playlist) and was remotely familiar with Eddie. But I used to get majorly confused between iron maiden and megadeath. Having heard the two bands more now, I know how grossly mistaken I was. They hardly sound the same and have clearly had different influences. Maybe I have a fascination for everything British, but maiden is more me than the rest of the heavy metal bands.

Most bands seem to dabble in different genres of music, but maiden has stayed the same in the basic music they produce. They are weirdly easy on the ear and make a lot of sense for a heavy metal band. Hehe. Who’se ever heard of such bands talking of stuff besides drugs & destruction (wars included – they all seem to have dabbled in war monger hating at some point of time or the other). There seems to be more to maiden. And even in their “we hate war” songs, they manage to get more across.

A cast of millions-a part to play
Killer? victim? or fool for a day
Obeying an order-men have to die
Us or them - a well rehearsed lie

So here I was, all excited for nothing and the songs they played seemed kind of new. I was vaguely familiar with “run to the hills.. run for your lives..” line and “trooper” of course I already knew. But everything else was, well, maiden to me. Must say, I liked it. The lead was all over the place and knew how to work up a crowd (it’s an art form very few get right.. axle rose, no matter how werid he was, was good at this and hence popular me thinks). I was involved. I was cheering. I was booing at the front row people ‘cos it’s so easy to hate ‘em and it felt awesome that dickinson seemed to share that feeling with the rest of us. All in all, they put on an awesome show. Dickinson even showed up in an Eddie costume with a Brit flag in tow.

They are going to tour Europe for sometime and might even head your way at some point. Do indulge. Maiden rocks indeed!

my favourite quote

You are led through your lifetime by the inner learning creature, the playful spiritual being that is your real self. Don't turn away from possible futures before you're certain you don't have anything to learn from them.

You're always free to change your mind and choose a different future, or a different past.

It's from Illusions . I've always loved those lines. Maybe they'll make as much sense to you as they did to me.

A different kind of sanity

It’s weird when something one should obviously stay away from can be good for you. Think of chocolate sundaes and brownies. Hehe. For someone who uses sweet food in metaphors, I hardly eat any. I like to let other people dig their own graves with high fatty food. Gosh all the times I didn’t eat the “so called yummy” apple cake in barista was good for me. Can’t imagine how much I would weigh with that to add to my conscience.

I didn’t mean food and the guilt trip it takes you through. I wanted to talk about what our usual life is and what the alternative path could be. We’ve all settled on a daily routine ‘cos it’s the one which offers the most sanity to us. Now, straying away from that, even for more than a day can throw most people off... well unless you are dysfunctional, in which case nothing generic would apply to you anyways.

The idea is that there is a different one too. I called my impromptu trip to Chennai a need for a different kind of sanity. Something to help soothe my mind and nerves. :-) Not sure if the trip actually provided that or not, but something so small can probably do very little. Major amends need to take place. One doesn’t need to stand like a rock in the pathway of water. That’s too tricky, for one, you could get washed away or eventually will get all worn out n tired. One can stay by the bank and get their feet wet from time to time and dunk in whenever it gets too hot.

The trick is to find that sagacity without having to live to be as old as the sages we usually see.

A list to get you going

It’s funny how we rarely put aside time for ourselves. I am not making a list or asking folk to do it to take stock of their relationships. But knowing what makes you truly happy is a very good thing indeed. So that’s the point of this exercise. I’ve listed my passions in life. The things that make me truly happy.

Music – from listening to going to concerts - its way up there

Traveling

Food – I actually enjoy food to the point where it’s probably sinful in a few religions :”>

Books

Comedy/ Humor – Funny saying something funny makes me happy. Not only do I marvel the genius that can come up with humorous ideas, but can enjoy it for what it is. It’s probably the few moments when I truly live for the moment without thinking about the sensibilities the joke’s hurting or what the author is talking about. Music isn’t so ‘cos it invariably ends up opening a very introspective chapter in my head and my favorite songs are so ‘cos they make me think about things.

Movies – I prefer comedies, but wouldn’t shun the others. They manage to teleport me to this other worlds, so seamlessly sometimes. I hate the sentimental films ‘cos I get so involved in all films and before you know it, I’ll be weeping to some sappy sod story.

Driving – A gust of wind on my face can do wonders to the curves around my mouth. Ohh and love driving in the rain.

Children – spending time with them, talking to them. It gets truly rewarding when they let you into their world. The uninhibited thought process, the unbridled joy for little things. Guess it’s just good to be around like minded people :-)

Talking – Not to sound like an egoist with that point, but there was a time when I thought I was rather special. Having known many more folk since then, I’ve realized such amazing things about other people and how beautiful some facets in people can be, even if I don’t incorporate them myself. I love talking to people, getting to understand their beliefs and passions in life. People light up when they talk about whatever it is that gets them started and I like seeing that. That kind of feeling is infectious and you’ll find yourself grinning before you know it. I for one love to grin.

So think of your passions. It’s nice to take a lil time off and think about them. For all you know, you’ve probably been ignoring some of them ‘cos you didn’t think about them till now. You’ve got nothing to loose.

About compatible relationship sets

This is from a mail I wrote to a friend. I had this theory…

I believe that everyone has a set list of passions that make them happy. They could be silly things like collecting stamps to watching tv, or comparatively serious things like working at soup kitchens to world travel. As a person grows, this list changes. At any given time, one might have something from 3 to7-8 in this list.

I think that for a decent relationship, people need to share at least 3 of them.

People in the relationship pick up the other person’s passion at times ‘cos you see how much indulging in it makes the other person happy. At times, people incorporate their partner’s habits along the way and make them their own. Of course no one can imbibe or really like every habit their partner will have, which is good. So, people sometimes do their own thing, which gives them the much needed space. If you have too little in common, one of the two will always feel that they are doing something that’s not fun together, ‘cos the activity being performed is one or the other’s passion and not something that’s common between the two. This will cause you to think that the reason you both have no fun together is ‘cos u aren’t into each other. This might be true too.

So what’s the point of all my gibberish? I think one needs a person who is similar up to a certain point, but who can also brings their own uniqueness to the table.

We don’t need to become alike completely for a good relationship. A good amount of space is actually healthy. You of course don’t want to give too much space that you are drifting off and you guys are always separate. You know what I mean. A healthy amount of space. How does one define that to start with? What is good for the goose is probably not that great for the gander.

Have I lost it :-/

As has been noted, I have slacked and the quantity of my blogs has slid drastically since I got back. So to counter that I should be writing something … but these things oughta come by themselves. I cannot fake frustration now can I :-)