What is a life worth?

I never thought that my sense of self worth would ever come into question. I am who I am. Just like everybody else. I don’t weight your collection of fava beans and you should not need to know my count. It’s not like we need to deal in them to survive, needing to swap them for stuff. But, somehow I get the sense that it isn’t the case.

I know how this works. People who have little of something are the only ones who really bother to think a lot about the lack of it. Hmm... and people who have loads of something are also quick to tally scores with anyone with a lower count. So mid ground is a good place to be in … but contentment is really a personal state of mind. If you are the kind who doesn’t get bothered with such things, then nothing will ruffle your feathers. It’s for the under-confident and the under-confident posing as over-confident douchebags that this whole affair pertains to.

Others should not be able to tell you where you should belong or should be doing or any such thing. And in any such process, should not cause you to doubt yourself. I shouldn’t care. I don’t need to and I certainly don’t have to. I’ve tried to shake it off, telling myself that I am great indeed and I don’t need anybody’s validations nor discredits to feel otherwise (please play Christina Aguilera’s “you are beautiful” in your head while you continue to read this. it sets the proper tone for all of this, I think).

My problem stems from my own actions and so I can’t really crib about it. It’s just that one should never need to question one’s place in anything. If only such convictions could be easily upheld in practice.