Graveyards are filled with indispensable men
Sarcastic lines strike me as more profound than flowery poetry.
My aunt’s brother passed away this morning and I was left to cook up something sensible to say to the immediate family. There is little one can offer as consolation at such a time, yet it is considered rude to not do it too I guess.
The immediate family is of course struck the hardest. It isn’t as if an asteroid hit them, but more like a stalagmite slowly crushed them to death. The initial wailing that movies show is just a farce. Most often than not, the real sorrow kicks in much later. As time passes by, it weirdly becomes apparent that the deceased will never really show up, and the void becomes more and more prevalent. Whoever said that it gets better with time probably never lost a dear one.
There is an exercise that therapists do. They draw this circle that’s all black and they say that’s you. The pain has consumed you entirely and there is little else. With time, it’s not that the pain has become lesser, but you have grown as a person to become and feel more than just the sorrow. It takes time to grow though!
Of course it’s sad that one’s life can loose such meaning with the dearth of someone else’s presence. I guess loosing to love and to death is not much different. You resort to musings and smiles, the timing for both of which can be so off sometimes that you end up kicking yourself. They both leave you feeling blessed and empty at the same time. The old line “better to have loved n lost, than to have ever loved at all” feels so true. I would not trade a single moment and am so glad to have had someone so beautiful in my life. The sorrow thats following will just have to be endured.
Hopefully with time, you grow so much that the pain is just a dot in your persona. I know I’d like that. For now I’ll resort to cheap tricks like begging for hugs till I feel better by myself.
My aunt’s brother passed away this morning and I was left to cook up something sensible to say to the immediate family. There is little one can offer as consolation at such a time, yet it is considered rude to not do it too I guess.
The immediate family is of course struck the hardest. It isn’t as if an asteroid hit them, but more like a stalagmite slowly crushed them to death. The initial wailing that movies show is just a farce. Most often than not, the real sorrow kicks in much later. As time passes by, it weirdly becomes apparent that the deceased will never really show up, and the void becomes more and more prevalent. Whoever said that it gets better with time probably never lost a dear one.
There is an exercise that therapists do. They draw this circle that’s all black and they say that’s you. The pain has consumed you entirely and there is little else. With time, it’s not that the pain has become lesser, but you have grown as a person to become and feel more than just the sorrow. It takes time to grow though!
Of course it’s sad that one’s life can loose such meaning with the dearth of someone else’s presence. I guess loosing to love and to death is not much different. You resort to musings and smiles, the timing for both of which can be so off sometimes that you end up kicking yourself. They both leave you feeling blessed and empty at the same time. The old line “better to have loved n lost, than to have ever loved at all” feels so true. I would not trade a single moment and am so glad to have had someone so beautiful in my life. The sorrow thats following will just have to be endured.
Hopefully with time, you grow so much that the pain is just a dot in your persona. I know I’d like that. For now I’ll resort to cheap tricks like begging for hugs till I feel better by myself.
posted by procrastinator at 11:58 AM
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